6 things I learned in 2025

Here we are, on the final day of 2025.

So many things have happened this year that I struggled to keep it concise while writing this recap, so I really had to pray about what God wanted me to write, to record, and to remember. There was no step-by-step process – all I did was open a blank document, pray that the Holy Spirit would write with me, and started typing.

If you’re reading this, I pray that God will speak to you through these words; that these insights will bless and encourage you. Let’s get into it!

Here are the 6 big things I learned this year:

1 – God speaks to us, particularly when we ask Him to. He can use anything and everything to communicate with us.

We moved to a different part of the country this year. It was a big move that happened really quickly. I had sensed God calling us to move, but wasn’t sure how and when it was going to happen. When it did, it happened really quickly due to all the doors that the Lord opened for us – things just fell into place.

But because of how quickly we made a decision and acted, I was very nervous.

What if we were making the wrong move? What if I heard God wrongly?

But the wheels had been put in motion, so I continued packing. The whirlwind of activity that is associated with moving kept me going.

It was only on moving day that my emotions finally caught up. I recall driving to Rolleston with tears streaming down my face, begging the Lord for confirmation – confirmation that we were, indeed, moving according to His plans for us. In hindsight, it’s a little silly to ask that question while driving away as it was (realistically) too late to change our minds. But my heart needed reassuring. So I prayed for Him to provide the confirmation, and to make it so obvious that I don’t miss it.

It wasn’t until we were two-thirds into our journey that I noticed the lights.

Every single traffic light that we passed from Clutha to Rolleston were green. There was not a single pause or stop along the way. (The only red light we encountered was when we briefly turned off the road for a toilet break – but the way I see it, that light doesn’t count because it technically isn’t a part of the route).

It was God’s way of telling me that we were going in the right direction.

I cried even harder on the final third of our travels.

But this time, they were tears of joy rather than uncertainty.

2 – Things are chains. The more we have, the more difficult it is to be free.

Up until October this year, we owned property in Clutha.

The real estate market in Clutha is slower moving than it is in major cities, and so we had to wait for quite a few months before our property sold.

While we had already largely moved on with our lives in Rolleston, we couldn’t shirk the responsibilities we had in Clutha.

The lawns had to be mowed. The home had to be insured. The rates had to be paid. Whether or not we lived there, that property was in our name. We owned it, so we were responsible for all the things that came with ownership.

It was a chain that tied us down to that place. We weren’t there physically, but we weren’t free of the place either. And because the property hadn’t sold, we weren’t in a financial position to put down roots here.

It was in this season that I TRULY made the head and heart connection of how things can be chains.

The more we have, the more stress and worry we have.

Which brings me to my next insight:

3 – Everything belongs to God. He will take care of His stuff. All we need to do is to steward it faithfully.

When the property wasn’t selling, all I could do was pray.

I prayed for the property to sell. I prayed for it to sell at the right price. I prayed for it to sell quickly.

They were good prayers, but I don’t think they were the right prayers.

I don’t know when or at what point my prayers changed, but they did. I had always known intellectually that everything we own belongs to God, but it was only through this season of grappling with unanswered prayer that I truly understood it.

Slowly, my prayers began to change.

I prayed prayers of Thanksgiving – that God had allowed us the privilege of enjoying and managing the home for the past few years.

Rather than praying for the property to sell quickly at the right price, I prayed for the right buyer to come long. That He would appoint new stewards for the property. That He would reveal to us who we were supposed to sell the property to and the amount to release it for.

It was His property, which meant it was His problem. His decision.

It was His all along, but I think God wanted me to surrender it to Him (in my heart) rather than pry it from my grip.

And once I did, things started happening.

He told me how much to sell it for. He told me who to sell it to.

All I had to do as the steward/manager was follow the Owner’s instructions.

And guess what?

It all worked out well.

This is an insight I am taking care to remember as we prepare to walk into another season of stewardship here in Rolleston.

All of it belongs to Him.

4 – Silence truly is golden.

This year, I’ve had the opportunity to attend two silent retreats at the Sister Eveleen retreat house.

At first, the idea of a silent retreat made me nervous. I was very hesitant signing up to the first one.

Wouldn’t silence be awkward? How would we communicate without speaking?

But because I needed a retreat and some time away for myself, I decided to bite the bullet and do it.

I was pleasantly surprised. Sure, it was a little awkward in the beginning – not speaking during meals was strange, and asking for the salt without words (there were lots of pointing and nudging) took a little getting used to – but I soon got used to it.

There was something really freeing and luxurious about having silence and empty space, and not having to fill it. I liken this experience to ‘real estate’ – one of the ways to tell how much someone has is by observing how much space they occupy.

It can be seen by how large someone’s house is. The more room they have, the more land they have, the richer they are (theoretically).

They don’t fill the empty space up with clutter.

The more room someone has on an airplane – first class or business class – is the indication of how much they have. After all, the uber rich fly in private jets and have the whole plane to themselves.

They don’t fill the space up with more people.

It’s the same with silence. Silence is empty space.

The idea of having silence during the retreat isn’t to restrict or prohibit speaking. Rather, it’s to eliminate the need for small talk or unnecessary chatter. To free people from the obligation of talking about the weather because it’s the ‘polite’ thing to do when there is nothing of depth to discuss.

Once I understood the heart and intention behind the silence, I started to enjoy it.

These days, I love it.

While it doesn’t mean that I never make small talk when I’m with others, it does mean that I’m a tad bit more comfortable with silence.

Because I want to enjoy the luxurious space that God has so graciously gifted me.

5 – Life is more about direction than destination.

Whenever I speak about my husband (especially if I’m speaking to another believer and we’re talking about faith-related things), I’ve always introduced my husband as a non-Christian.

It was only this year that someone I respect dearly challenged me about that, and encouraged me to rephrase.

I had subconsciously and unintentionally put my husband (and by default, myself and everyone else in my world) in a box – Christians vs non-Christians. You were either in this category or you were in the other category. There was no in-between.

And while I do believe that is true for when Jesus comes again – you’ll either be with Christ or not – our current life is a completely different matter.

Life, at present, is a journey. And on this journey, there is a whole spectrum that exists in between the Christian and non-Christian spectrum that is not obvious. Despite not being quantifiable (how long is a piece of string?), this spectrum does indeed exist.

And so one thing I learned this year is to be comfortable staying on the spectrum.

Living with a million shades of grey rather than insisting that things are black or white.

I’m learning that direction is more important that the destination.

Is the person heading towards Jesus or away from Jesus?

Because someone could be a ‘Christian’ but not be following Jesus.

And likewise, someone could be a ‘non-Christian’, but still be following Jesus.

Whether or not someone is a true believer isn’t for me to judge/decide, that’s not my job.

My job is to love them and treat them the way Christ would. The rest is up to Him.

So these days, rather than saying my husband is a non-Christian, I say that he’s on his own journey.

He comes to church every Sunday. He’s generous with his resources. He took days off work so that we can attend church conference as a family.

I can’t see and I don’t know what’s in his heart, so I can’t say for sure.

But it looks like he’s headed towards Jesus.

5 – There are consequences to disobedience.

If I had to describe my relationship with God in one word, the word would be: Wrestling.

I’m like Jacob; I’m always wrestling with God – for control, for certainty, for blessing, for wanting things to go my way, look a certain way etc.

I always think I know better, so I say no to God. A lot. It’s embarrassing to admit, but it’s true.

For the longest time, I’ve known that God wants to partner with me in writing a sequel to the first book I published (Finding me).

But I flat out refused. Profusely.

In fact, I slammed the door shut in God’s face – I didn’t even want to allow Him to continue talking – because the first book took a lot out of me.

It consumed so many resources – time, money, energy – that I feel as if I haven’t recouped until today.

Perhaps it’s slothfulness, or maybe it’s fear, but I just didn’t want to do it. So I told Him no.

But God has highlighted to me this year that He doesn’t need me to write this story. He is more than happy to pass it to someone else and work with them instead.

It was in that moment that I panicked.

God had given me this story, this assignment, this project that I get to work on with Him ….. yet here I was, saying no to the privilege?

All of a sudden, I didn’t want to lose it.

And so, while begging and pleading with God to not take it away from me, I’ve started.

It’s scary, because I haven’t heard God’s response.

I’m reminded of how a whole generation of Israel couldn’t enter the promised land because they said no to God.

And it terrifies me that that may be me. That He may already have assigned the task to someone else.

But because I haven’t had confirmation of that (God hasn’t told me to NOT do it like He did with the Israelites), I’m starting. I’m writing.

But it’s hard. It’s excruciatingly difficult.

The difficulty is self-inflicted, because I’ve put off writing for the past 3 years and I’m terribly rusty. I’ve lost a lot of the literary eloquence that my writing used to possess. I’m not as fluent. The words don’t flow like they used to, and it’s taking an awfully long time to get back into the habit of writing.

It’s the consequences of my disobedience.

But I am working in faith and trust that that will come back in time.

As long as God doesn’t tell me no, I’m going to work on it.

And trust that He still wants to work on this with me.

So, there you have it, my 6 lessons for 2025! To be honest I wanted to have 7, but as this recap really wasn’t planned with structure, I thought I’d stop when the Spirit prompted me to.

What’s in store for 2026?

I’m not 100% clear on what God is having me do. All I know is that 2026 is a year for me to plant deep roots and to build my foundations; whether that’s spiritually, or in my relationships, or business.

What that looks like for now are 3 main things:

- Participating in the Foundation year for the spiritual direction formation program

- Taking two courses for the Graduate certificate of coaching program at SIT

- Completing the two books that I’m currently working on

I’m trusting God to light the way as I walk in it, so it’s a matter of watching this space as 2026 unfolds.

Thank you for reading this far! If you have any lessons/insights that you’ve learned this year that you’d like to share, do get in touch with me. I read every single message and email.

Enjoy the last of 2025, and happy 2026 to you and your loved ones!